No wonder, since 1 in 150 children in the United States will be diagnosed with autism spectrum disorders. If you’re a boy, the numbers are even higher at 1 in 99.

If you’re wondering what the signs for autism in toddlers are, here’s a list of the 3 main differences toddlers and young children display who go on to be diagnosed with autism. EVERY child who is diagnosed with autism does not have every sign listed below, but there are definite differences noted in at least 3 areas which lead professionals to suspect autism. 

Autism is a spectrum diagnosis- meaning that there’s a range in severity from mild to severe. It also means that some children who will eventually be diagnosed with autism at older ages may have only some of these symptoms as a toddler, and then because no action was taken to help them improve, the issues actually get worse as the child ages. Even if your child has only half of these characteristics at age 2 or 3, it IS a cause for concern, and you should pursue every avenue possible, not only to verify a diagnosis for him, but more importantly, to do what you can as a parent to make things better. 

The 3 main areas that lead professionals to diagnose autism in a toddler or young preschooler are differences in :  

Communication Skills

Interaction Skills

Behaviors

I’ll explain each of the 3 areas of concern, then give you a comprehensive list of signs and symptoms. If you’ll look closely, each individual issue can be placed in one of the 3 main categories. 

Communication Skills -  This means how a child expresses himself AND how he understands others. If your child is not yet talking by 2, and ESPECIALLY is he’s not yet using gestures like pointing to show you what he wants, his communication skills are delayed.

Using non-verbal gestures to communicate with others is a skill that develops in babies before the 12- month mark. If your older toddler is not pointing and using other gestures, like very purposeful facial expressions to communicate his wants and needs to you, chances are, he’s not developing communication skills as he should.

If your child can say lots of words, but doesn’t USE these words to ask you for things, then there’s also a problem. A verbal child can still have autism. If he can label pictures or objects, but he doesn’t USE these words to request, he’s not really communicating with you. If she can sing a whole song, but she doesn’t tell you what she wants using words, there is a difference in how her communication skills are developing.      

If he’s also not UNDERSTANDING language as well other toddlers his same age, it’s a double whammy. Babies as young as 12 months of age can follow simple directions  such as waving bye-bye on command, giving kisses, pointing to body parts, and even responding to questions to identify familiar people and objects in their environments by looking at the correct item or person when you ask, “Where’s ___________.” 

If your child is 2 or 3 and NOT doing these things, this is almost always not just a matter of being a “late bloomer” or a simple lag in development.  

There are many reasons a toddler is slow to talk, and autism is just one of them. However, if you remain concerned, and especially if late talking isn’t your child’s only issue, read on.  

Interaction Skills - Interacting with others is THE  foundational skill for ALL other skills your baby and toddler will learn in his whole lifetime.  If your child is approaching 2 or 3 and is NOT consistently making eye contact, NOT consistently acting like he wants to be with others, but he seems to prefer to be on his own doing his own thing, and especially if he is NOT consistently responding when you talk to him, there is a MAJOR problem. 

“My child is social. He can’t have autism.”

This is the #1 reason a parent, and even some professionals, incorrectly assume that a child does not have autism. Sometimes children with autism may seem pretty connected to their parents (especially their mothers), but upon closer analysis, there are quality and quantity differences in how they interact with even their parents. 

What do I mean by a “quality” difference? This means that a young child may seek his mother out for comfort, but in a non-interactive way. He may want to sit in her lap and smell or twirl her hair, but he doesn’t look her in the eye for very long. He doesn’t really return her hugs and kisses, and he certainly doesn’t initiate these.  Yes, he may hold his face or mouth still for a kiss, but his eyes are diverted to the side, and he’s not taking his hands and turning her head toward his to initiate the kiss at ages 1, 2, or even 3. 

He may allow himself to be hugged by “backing into” his mother’s arms, but he’s not running to her with open arms and a huge grin, and he certainly doesn’t return her pats on the back with affection of his own. The child may hook her arm around her mother’s leg to hide from a stranger in a new situation, but she’s not using other gestures or shared facial expressions to let her mother know what’s wrong.

The only real “communication” going on here is that the child has realized that her mother is there, and then Mom is doing all of the “interpreting” what’s going on. There are no real shared experiences or real joint attention to events or even objects, other than Mom or Dad is super tuned-in to what a child is needing when he is reacting to his environment.   

In children with typical language and interaction skills, even a non-verbal child is also looking, showing, and at least trying to convey information. In children who are at-risk for autism, parents are doing most, if not all, of the communicative “heavy lifting.” Parents of children with autism are often “mind readers” and have become so highly adept at reading their child’s emotional wants and needs that the parents don’t even realize how much their child DOESN’T communicate and interact. It’s often a huge reality check for them when someone points out how one-sided the interaction really is.

What is a “quantity” difference?

This means that although a young toddler or preschooler may seem to prefer only his mother when something is going wrong, he doesn’t also seek her out to share enjoyment or another emotion.  She may refuse all other adults, even her own father’s attempts to connect with her. 

Again, a mother may be so in-tune with her two-year old that she knows he LOVES trains, and she comments and responds excitedly when they see Thomas or another real train as they driving in the car, but again, the child’s reaction is not interactive. He’s excited about the train, but he’s not saying, “Mama! Look! Choo-choo!” He’s not trying to point and get her attention so they can interact and SHARE the experience.

He’s excited alright, but not in an interactive way. He may flap his hands and jump around, but it’s MOM who is doing the sharing and attending. It’s not reciprocal. He may even glance at her for a second or two when she too reacts to the event, but he’s not reacting reciprocally, or BECAUSE she’s responded to him. He’s very one-sided in his responses. He’s smiling. He’s happy. But when you truly analyze his responses, he’s not with  the adult or taking turns during interactions.  

Some parents of a child who goes on to be diagnosed with autism note that their child does use a couple of communicative gestures such as taking mom’s or dad’s hands to do something he can’t do, or she may lead them to what she wants. This is a very common occurence for a child who is higher functioning on the  autism spectrum. On one hand, he realizes, “These big hands can get what I want.” 

So what does he do? He begins to grab your hands to open doors, activate toys, or even pull you to the kitchen, but again, there’s a quality and quantity difference. He doesn’t grab your hands to show affection (a quality difference); in fact, he may often resist your attempts to help him unless he’s initiated it because he wants something (a quantity difference). 

He may have waved bye-bye once or twice (a quantity difference) by watching his own hand open and close (a quality difference), but again, he can’t wave consistently when someone is leaving his home (a quantity difference). She may adamantly shake her head “no” when she’s mad that you’re doing something to her, but she can’t use a head shake for “no” when you ask her if she wants something (a quality and quantity difference).       

Typically developing children want to share experiences very early on. If you have a 2 year old who seeks you out only when he’s scared or extremely tired, there’s likely something missing in his social-emotional skill development.

Behaviors - Almost every young child who goes to be diagnosed with autism is described as having some form of “odd” behavior. This might include what professionals call stereotypical behaviors such as flapping his hands, walking or jumping on his toes, wringing his hands, leaning forward when he’s excited and staring for an unusually long time at an object, running and darting his eyes to the side, unusual fascinations and interests, displaying horrible tantrums that come on suddenly and don’t go away within a few minutes, or saying words or phrases that don’t match the situation. 

Children who go on to be diagnosed with autism usually display some kind of behavior that routinely makes anyone other than his doting, adoring parents pause and  think, “Gee. That’s different,”    

Negative attention to a child’s “unique habit” so hurts the feelings of parents with a child with these kinds of issues. If you’re reading this and are feeling defensive, wounded, or want to throw up because of the horrible feelings you’re having right now, chances are, your child is demonstrating this type of behavior. 

Whether it be a child’s ”odd” behavior, an extremely aggressive behavior, a even a child’s habit of saying things that don’t quite fit the situation, or even if it’s what you’ve come to believe is an extremely “original” or “creative” behavior, if a behavior is calling so much attention to itself that others, well-meaning or not, are commenting to you about it, it’s probably not within the realm of “normal” or “typical.”

Here’s a list of more specific kinds of communication, interaction, or behavioral issues that parents report in their children who go on to be diagnosed with autism. This is not an official diagnostic list, but rather a list of concerns parents report. This list was gathered from several sources.

• Does not consistently respond to his/her name.
• Cannot tell you what he/she wants with words or gestures.
• Doesn’t follow directions.
• Seems to be deaf at times.
• Seems to hear sometimes, but not others.
• Doesn’t point or wave bye-bye (past 15 months) or use other gestures such as shaking his head “yes” or “no” appropriately and back and forth in conversation.
• Used to say a few words or babble, but now he/she doesn’t.
• Throws intense or violent tantrums.
• Has odd movement patterns such as flapping arms or shaking body, especially when excited.
• Shows other odd visual behaviors such as staring repeatedly at spinning wheels on a toy or shifting his eyes to the side as he runs.
• Seems hyperactive much of the time; is always “on the go.”
• Is often uncooperative or oppositional during daily routines.
• Doesn’t know how to play with toys. Might spin or line them up excessively.
• Doesn’t smile when smiled at.
• Doesn’t make eye contact. He/she seems to look right through/past you.
• Gets “stuck” on things over and over and can’t move on to other things.
• Seems to prefer to play alone.
• Gets things for him/herself only without asking for help.
• Is very independent for his/her age.
• Seems to be in his/her “own world.”
• Seems to tune people out.
• Shows very little interest in other children.
• Or may interact inappropriately with other children.
• Walks on his/her toes.
• Shows unusual attachments to toys, objects, or schedules (i.e., always holding a string or having to put socks on before pants).
• Spends a lot of time lining things up or putting things in a certain order and gets upset if this is disrupted.
• Has delayed speech-language skills when compared to other children of the same age.
• Memorizes and quotes long scripts of favorite TV shows, sing entire songs, or label lots of objects, but he/she uses very few “real” or meaningful words to ask for things or participate in conversation.
• Repeats what he/she hears rather than using words on his own.
• Learns to read at age 2 or 3 (or has a very strong interest in visual symbols such as letters and numbers), but has difficulty communicating with others in a meaningful way.
• Is a very picky eater. May eat only 3 or 4 different foods.

Let me reiterate that the presence of a few, or even several, of these concerns does not always mean that your child is autistic.  Please discuss these signs/symptoms with a your pediatrician, and then decide whether a comprehensive developmental assessment is needed for your child.

WHAT IF YOU SUSPECT THAT YOUR CHILD IS AUTISTIC? 

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

Research tells us that early identification and treatment for children with these difficulties is essential before these symptoms become severe, and chronic patterns are established.  Waiting until a child is in preschool or kindergarten before seeking professional and educational assistance NEVER leads to the best outcome for a child with any developmental delay.  The earlier a child is diagnosed, the better chance he has of correcting his problems.

Children do not “outgrow” these issues. Actually, waiting can make these developmental issues even worse. The skills we want to see may not come in on their own, and the habits we don’t want to see, may even get worse.   

Research also tells us that children with autism, regardless of the severity, can make progress with specialized intervention that focuses on facilitating developmentally appropriate skills.  The current recommended “best practices guideline” for a child with autism is that he or she be involved in AT LEAST 25 HOURS PER WEEK of engaged time with caring, nurturing adults.  This can be a combination of time in therapy, structured and developmentally appropriate preschool (Not mother’s day out), and quality, focused 1:1 play at home with mom and dad or other trained assistants. 

Parents with children with autism play a crucial role in determining the ultimate outcome of their child.  Success comes when parents make a huge commitment to learning their child’s unique strengths and weakness, become their child’s biggest advocates, and wholeheartedly embrace a comprehensive approach to improving their child’s developmental skills.  This means getting a child professionally evaluated as soon as your gut tells you there’s a problem, selecting and following through with appropriate treatments, and pursuing additional education about your child’s needs until you become the best “expert” you can be.  It’s not easy, but it will be worth it.                 

EARLY INTERVENTION leads to the best outcome for a child with any developmental delay.  The earlier a child is diagnosed, the better chance he has of correcting his problems.

Early intervention doesn’t only mean a specific program carried out by professionals, but also, what YOU as parent do to help your child develop skills he’s missing.

Many parents searching for information become so sad that there may be a problem that they become paralyzed with fear.  Although this is completely understandable, please don’t get stuck here. 

There are many things that YOU as a parent can do at home to help your child learn to interact, communicate, and eventually behave. Although professional intervention IS extremely important and necessary for young children suspected to be at-risk for autism spectrum disorder, the actions of a child’s parents are just as, if not more, important.

If you are struggling to interact with and communicate with your child whom you suspect might have autism, there is a way to learn very simple, but specific technqiues to help YOU learn to interact with, communicate with, and teach your child.    

If what you’ve tried at home isn’t working, look for ways to learn to do things differently. You need to change the way you do things to get new results, and here’s how.  

 
THERE ARE EASY, FUN, NO-TEARS METHODS THAT HELP PARENTS TEACH YOUR TODDLER TO INTERACT, UNDERSTAND, AND TALK.

It’s a series of DVDs called Teach Me To Talk, Teach Me to Listen and Obey 1, and Teach Me To Listen and Obey 2. This series was designed to teach YOU, your child’s parent, effective strategies that will help your child learn to attend, interact, understand and finally unlock that beautiful voice your child has locked away inside. And best of all, these strategies are PROVEN to be simple to learn, easy to apply, and best of all, successful in teaching young children to learn to understand words so that they can begin to communicate.

What makes these DVDs different?

It was developed by Laura Mize, a pediatric speech-language pathologist and author of the parent-friendly website www.teachmetotalk.com.  Laura has  literally spent thousands of hours and 15 years on the floor, helping toddlers with speech-language delays, even those who are at-risk for autism, learn to communicate.

Laura has read stacks and stacks of research on the subject of delayed speech in children. She’s attended more professional courses than you can count. She’s taken the best of the best from all the “experts” in language development.

And she’s condensed all those years of learning and experience and trial and error into 3 DVDs, with the  most simple, most practical, MOST EFFECTIVE strategies to get your child understanding language and then talking. And best of all, you can start using them the minute you start watching the DVD.

“I recently watched a DVD called Teach Me to Talk, by Laura Mize, Pediatric Speech-Language Pathologist. The DVD was 90 minutes long and taught six strategies to teach your child to talk,”  says Sarah, mother  of a little girl diagnosed with autism and and author of the website www.wakingsophie.com

“The DVD is aimed at toddlers who are delayed in speech…..which is how I will use it. It has tons of video of the speech therapist actually working with children! This was so informative. Laura explains what she is doing while showing actual video of her working with children with delays! These are things you can incorporate in every day interaction with your child. I finished watching the video feeling like I could really teach my child to talk!

From the time I first learned Sophie had autism, I have wanted to see what a speech therapist actually did while working with a child. I desperately want to homeschool Sophie, but until now I have been in the dark about what the experts do to get children to talk. Now I have video examples to work with.

I watched this video with my 3 children in the room, and my daughter Sophie, was actually playing along with the video! I highly recommend this video for anyone who has a child with delayed speech. It is worth every penny.” Sarah, Indiana

Read another mother’s review -
“Wow! I will always have a special spot in my heart for Laura and all the teachmetotalk gang. The resources compiled here are amazing! I’ve had the DVD for about 2 weeks now, and I LOVE it! There is just only so much an SLP can do with/for you child- lets face it- it’s really up to us, the parents. And most toddlers respond better to a familiar mommy/daddy than an ‘once a week’ SLP. Well, unless we’re lucky enough to have someone like Laura as our SLP. The six techniques discussed in the DVD were very eye opening. Especially using “with-holding/frustration”. My son responds very well with this technique. He said his second three word sentence! He was grunting for more animal crackers, his Sunday School teacher knows that he can sign, and was requiring him to do so. Out of frustration, he finally said “I WANT MORE”. We were all thrilled! I really suggest everyone to buy this DVD, there are ideas that you’ve probably not thought of. And Laura demonstrates her techniques in sessions with a wide age range of children. Thank you so much Laura and the whole gang, for all your hard work!!”Stephanie, Oklahoma

Interested in seeing the techniques in action? Here’s a quick preview of the Six Essential Strategies you’ll learn — and a glimpse of the first technique you’ll see in Teach Me To Talk:

Enter the coupon code “A1″ to save $10.00 on a single DVD. You’ll receive Teach MeTo Talk, Teach Me To Listen and Obey 1, or Teach Me To Listen and Obey 2 for only $29.99.